Lost WIthout Him

I do not function well when Nick is away. It's crazy that even after almost 15 years of marriage I still miss him intensely when he is not there. I feel a void like a school girl left behind when her boyfriend goes to summer camp. I am very dependent on my husband emotionally. He is my best friend and we talk to each other often throughout the day. I depend on him for encouragement and strength when I am having a difficult time making sense of my busy schedule. I love my daily routine and I love staying busy and serving others but when Nick is away, the days feel hectic and lonely.

I can't help but wonder if we the church, His bride, feels the same when we are not spending time with Christ. Do we depend on Him for encouragement and strength? Do we long to have conversations with Him and be close to Him throughout the day? If we didn't spend much time with Christ, would we be able to function or would our days seem hectic and lonely? Do we notice? Would His absence leave a void in our lives?

I do not function well when Nick is away, but I am lost without daily time with Jesus. It is the time I spend talking with Him and studying His word that gives me perspective and reminds me to be joyous in all circumstances. You see friends, life is hard. This world is mutated by sin and death. It seems when one problem is resolved another one pops up and life is a continuous cycle of highs and lows. But when we fix our eyes on Christ and we draw close to Him, life starts to make sense. We are given the strength to refrain from despair when things get tough and given the ability to rejoice in all circumstances. The highs and lows start to level out as we look at the world through the eyes of Christ and grab hold of His strength as He provides for His bride and lovingly gives her strength and encouragement to make sense of it all.

As I rock sweet Stella while Nick is away, I celebrate my husband and the marriage God has given me. I celebrate our dependency upon each other and companionship we share. I celebrate Jesus and the perspective I gain when I am in His word and spending time with Him. I celebrate the love He has for me and the beautiful imagery of the church being His bride, for the church is dependent upon Him for her needs and finds fulfillment in Christ's companionship. I celebrate the truth that comes from knowing with Jesus I can function and meet the challenges this world throws at me. Jesus helps me make sense of it all and I am lost without Him.

We Are A "Unique and Humorous" Family

My life is crazy and far from "normal". This realization has made me uneasy in the past. Sometimes I feel like because our lives are not "normal", I am letting my kids down. The church is our second home and my kids have a dinner or events sponsored by the church multiple nights a week. They sacrifice home time for church time and our lives are far from "normal". I love my life but I feel like my kids are getting drug along for the ride and I wonder if they long to have a normal routine like others kids their age.

We are moving out of our apartment and into a home. The kids are very excited and Nick and I are so ready for more space and a kitchen table we don't have to pull away from the wall when we eat dinner. It's little things like more closet space and counter space that get me through the stress of a move. I can't wait for my kids to have a back yard to play in and to host dinners again with friends and neighbors. Moving is strenuous, and time precious, so Nick is trying to be strategic and move us over the next couple weeks.

Nick was packing up Samantha's room and he found this note.

The phrase that stuck out to me was, "I love this very unique and humorous family". Friends the things in life that make your family unique, give my kids joy, an identity and a purpose. I feel like I am running them ragged and robbing them of normalcy, but I'm starting to realize they love our crazy life as much as I do. Always having something to do and new people to meet is "normal" to them. Taking care of others, and roller skating at the church while mom and dad prepare for worship is "normal" to them. You see friends, my kids recognize the importance of putting Christ first and we try daily to prioritize what Christ puts value in, time with Him and serving others. I get it now. My normal, as crazy as it is, gives my family joy and purpose. I need to stop comparing my family to others and stop longing to be something I am not. When we embrace the beauty that is the crazy mess God is working and doing in us, we find peace, joy, and purpose.

What is the crazy beautiful mess in your life that your kids find their identity in? Whatever it is, I pray we will all cherish how He made our families so we can be secure in our purpose and not long for "normal" but strive for uniqueness as we live fully surrendered lives for Jesus. Let's celebrate daily the humor and love we share with our families. Let's remember memories can be built grocery shopping and getting pizza. Activities done with purpose and center on quality time can mold and shape our children to serve others and have priorities centered on things important to Christ.

I love this note, and will treasure it always. My family is unique, not normal. The old me would try harder to mask our differences, the new me will display them proudly in Christ for they point to my priorities and what I value in life. May we all strive to find our purpose in the things of God and put His desires above our own as we love and serve our families, neighbors, and those around us.

I belong to a unique and humorous family... yeah I have lots of cause to celebrate!

Finding a Voice Through Personal Reflection

Life seems to have me very distracted right now. All the things I want to do, I don't seem to have the time or energy for. Can you relate with me friends? My intentions are good and my schedule jammed packed with good things but I wonder. Can you have too many good things that rob you of the time you should spend with the Creator of all things good?

I haven't written in a couple weeks. Time has been a big reason, but also I just don't feel like I have anything to say. I started getting nervous about that. Ideas were just not coming to me and I didn't have a lot of insight into my present circumstance. As I went through my busy routine and completed tasks that were at hand, I didn't feel like sitting down and reflecting on my day. I just wanted to get the kids bathed, avoid any huge blow ups, and sit in front of the piles of laundry that need folding as I wonder where I should begin.

I didn't feel like I had the energy to reflect and look at what God is doing in my life and the lives of those around me. It's not that I wasn't appreciative or I didn't know He was there, I just didn't have time to stop and think. Maybe you can relate? As I read God's word this morning and prayed, God revealed something to me about reflection. It is through our personal reflection, God gives us something to say. When we look back at what we've been through and what God did, He blesses us with words to write, words to speak, words to encourage. You see friends, it is through this discipline that Christ reveals to us our calling and purpose.

Think about it. When we reflect and look back, we understand better the circumstances and valleys we have walked. We see God's plan to make us stronger, purge our lives of addiction or unhealthy relationships and sinful behaviors. God refines us into a creation who looks more like him when we stop and acknowledge the transforming power that is given on the cross. It is when we look back, that God blesses us with insight and shows us the pain of life was worth it. Reflection reminds us of our dependency upon Christ and the strength we can draw when we call upon His name.

I didn't have much to say because I didn't take the time to stop and reflect on what God is doing in my life. When I stopped, reveled at His goodness and marveled in His love, a story began to unfold because I took the time to commune with the One who writes my story to begin with.

Friends if you feel like you don't have a voice, if you feel like your story doesn't matter; stop and reflect. Look at what He has done and is doing in your life and the lives of those around you. Thank Him for bringing you to the other side and look at the blessings that can easily be hidden by the darkness. Through reflection, God can speak to us so we can learn from past mistakes or praise Him for past blessings.

We all should take time each day to stop and reflect as we look back at the story God is writing in my lives. When I meditate on scripture, vulnerably pray, and reflect on past circumstances I cultivate a relationship with my Savior that can sustain me through the most busy seasons of life. When I rob myself of this intimate time with Jesus, I become off balanced and not centered. Satan starts to whisper thoughts of shame, inadequacy, and abandonment. My quiet time with God allows me to continue my busy life. It s in the quiet times of reflection that He gives me the fuel I need to make it through the day.

So I celebrate those quiet times of reflection. I celebrate the amazement I still feel when I see God working out an icky situation for His good. I celebrate the lessons God teaches me and the intimacy I share with my Creator when I stop and think about what he has done for me. He loves me, truly He does. No matter how amateur the offering is, He sticks it on His refrigerator proudly and displays the precious gift from His child. Friends may we all strive to put time aside everyday to reflect on Christ and what he has done in our lives. May we celebrate Him by sacrificing a block of time each day so He can talk with us and help us through the storms of life.

Celebrate the gifts, celebrate His goodness. Stop, reflect, and see that He has done great things. Allow God to teach you through your past circumstances so you can testify and teach others about His love and transforming power. Don't get so focused on what is to come that you miss the lessons taught by what we left behind. We all have a story to tell. The question is, will you take the time to learn what your story is.